Hey guys! So, I’ve recently decided that I’m still really smart and should continue pursuing wealth, success, etc. Here’s my second business endeavor. Enjoy! Introducing…. facebooo.com. Facebook for ghosts! Are you tired of being told that you can’t use social networking sites just because you’re a ghost? Well, facebooo.com is the thing for you! Facebooo.com is the ONLY place to haunt all of your friends (and strangers!), to provide photographic evidence in order to prove your existence, and to chat with your boo ;)
Hey guys! So, I’ve recently decided that I’m really smart and should try my hand at entrepreneurship. Here’s my first business endeavor. Enjoy!
Introducing….
facebawk.com. Facebook for chickens!
Are you tired of being told that you can’t use social networking sites just because you’re a chicken? Well, facebawk.com is the thing for you!
Facebawk.com is the ONLY place to announce the morning’s arrival, peck all of your friends, and meet some hot chicks ;)
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And just because someone apparently thought of this idea before me (psh, whatever), I should probably give a shout-out, just in case:
http://www.facebawk.com/
In a successful game of improv, the performer thinks quickly, acts confidently, and maintains a positive attitude.
Sounds a little bit like real life, doesn’t it? ;)
No. No it doesn’t.
In fact, in order to live a successful life, you need to do the opposite of all those things!
1) “Thinking quickly?” I go through life thinking at the rate that my fingernails grow, because I’ve spent my life in front of TVs instead of behind books.
Don’t get me wrong - I wasn’t watching the TVs, I just happened to be situated in front of them while I trained myself to think as slowly as humanly possible.
And now I’m one of the slowest-thinking people on the planet. It feels good to excel.
2) “Acting confidently?” Oh, PLEASE. I go through life telling everyone about my disgusting sinus problem and how I’ll never feel any self-worth because of it. Usually, they never speak to me again.
However, this problem has helped me to avoid non-sinus-problem-sufferer sympathizers, meaning that my group of friends only consists of people who are extremely enthusiastic about my snot irregularities.
3) And “maintaining a positive attitude?” No, no. I go through life wallowing in a pit of despair, using tears to water my vegetable garden.
And now I have tons of fresh vegetables!
You see it everywhere. Boys don’t want girls to show too much skin, because they want you to leave “just enough to the imagination.” Uh……..okay…..? Yes, there is obviously variation among women’s bodies. But aside from cup size and degree of ass robustness, it is my understanding that we all pretty much have the same thing going on under our clothes. Which begs the question: what are these dudes imagining? “Bro, check her out. Oh man, skinny jeans leave just enough to the imagination.” “Yeah, dude, what do you think she’s got under there?” “I’m thinking…like, maybe a jet ski.” “No way, bro!” “And like, maybe a small community of Tibetan monks.” “Oh, dude, that’s so HOT!” “Right?! Ahhhhh…I’m so hungry.”
